Music and Dating and Matching, Part 1

[Image can be found here]

We all have stories about the role music has played in our relationships – for better or worse.  Whether it’s something as trite as a couple’s “our song” or as creepy as groupies of reunited 80s hair-metal bands, music is inextricably linked to love, lust, or, in the case of dating, potential.  C’mon, surely you too have been on dates or at the early stages of a relationship where you wondered about the compatibility of the other person’s taste in music.  If you’re lucky, you get to pat yourself on the back for finding someone who reinforces your taste and enhances your cultural capital; if you’re not, then you have to create the appropriate Venn diagrams to decide how much you really want to be with that person.  I don’t know if Match or eHarmony uses music taste in their matching algorithms, but I bet I would have as much success simply by knowing participant music tastes.  Admittedly, it would be a fairly extensive survey to weigh musical taste and judge musical competence, but I contend that the success rate would be quite similar to that of established dating services.  (I’ll have to work on the survey for fun.)

One of my single cousins (who doesn’t seem to read my blog) is fearful – based on exaggerations and faulty memories of others, I might add – of introducing potential boyfriends because of my unfounded reputation for being overprotective and harsh on said potential boyfriends.  Now, I admit, I do ask pointed questions that are entirely legitimate and warranted based purely on what the potential boyfriend (or girlfriend) says in the course of the initial meeting.  I mean, it’s not like I come prepared with a docket of pre-researched evidence and background checks, at least not anymore.  Anyway, if she prefers, she can simply send me his iTunes library in text form instead of a physical introduction.  Wait, what?  You did a search for “Rammstein” in his iTunes and found 31 entries?  Ah, sorry, thanks for playing, but he already lost.  (Feel free to substitute “Rammstein” with “Jimmy Buffett”, “Celine”, “Vanilla Ice”, or “Bob Marley” – but only if he bought Marley songs during a stint in a fraternity.)

So, here’s the first in a series of posts to connect music and dating/relationships.  I am, ahem, happily married, but entirely fascinated with the idea that one’s music tastes informs one’s romantic life/choices.  I’ll use a variety of sources, including actual Craigslist’s Personals ads, news items, and real dating stories and match them to appropriate songs/albums/artists.  Some will be serious, others will be in jest.

Let’s start with this Personals ad in Chicago:

I want a life to spend with my love – 22

I believe many things that most people want. Many people do not listen to there heart so they are not so aware of what they are looking for their life. I feel that communication is the most important thing in any strong relationship.

She is (probably)…

• romantic at heart
• more attracted to the idea of love than the trials of love
• not particularly strong at written communication
• a fan of Oprah and Oprah’s Book Club, but finds reading a pesky activity
• attracted to Eastern European men given her ad picture

As her matchmaker, the song I would choose for her and any potential mate is…

Ever Fallen In Love (With Someone You Shouldn’t've), The Buzzcocks (from Love Bites, 1978 – Buy Here).